Why is it that...

airplanes give you a floatation device and not a parachute? Sorry, that's just something I've always wondered.

Why is it that no matter what I talk to my mom about (when it comes to something that's bothering me) I never feel better afterwards? She makes me feel like I should not have wasted my time talking to her about it. She just drags me down emotionally instead of helping me with whatever is bothering me at that moment. It's not like I'm just complaining. It's usually a bonafide problem, but it never helps to talk to her.

Why is it my own family doesn't understand me? I don't get it. It's not like I'm that difficult to grasp. I have lots of airheaded moments - I grew up in California, the sun did something to my brain cells (I swear!). I don't always know what's going on in the world around me (I blame that on the California sun as well). I just don't fit in my own family.

Maybe it's because I've had a very different set of experiences than anyone in my family. I definitely went through things that they never went through. Those things made me question everything from a very young age. It's actually amazing that I am still naive and trust anyone. I actually put my trust in people way too quickly and then am completely surprised when they hurt me. You'd think I'd learn my lesson by now, but oh well. I'm way too old to change that aspect of my personality. I am who I am. Thankfully I still trusts people even when I learned at a young age that those that are supposed to love and protect you can hurt you the most and in the worst ways.

It's amazing how an experience will change you even without your knowledge. I know that I am the person I am today because of the things I have gone through and my reactions to those circumstances. If one of my reactions or experiences were changed, I would be a completely different person today.