Friday, December 08, 2006

I took the time...

last night to go through each post (155 now, I can hardly believe it). While I was at each post, I corrected any misspellings, added labels to all posts (see the side bar for your favorites), and replaced the names of family members with the guide on the right (getting tired of spelling everything out all the time - this should make posting easier). All of that took me about 2 1/2 hours last night, but it is complete and ready.

I love the label ability. It helps me to see what I've been talking about for the past year and shows me how often my family gets to me or specific things cross my mind. I am trying to keep my labels to those on the right without adding too many, so there may be more in random thoughts that could be put into another category, but I've decided to keep it there for now. Frustration seems to be a good category, but for now we'll keep it to what I've got. Obviously, "life lessons" are probably happening when I've gained "insight". These can also be part of my "philosophy", so we will see how things turn out.

H is working until around 10:00 tonight, so I'm going to be home alone all day. I went and had lunch with him today, so at least I'll see him a little bit.

Gotta tell you...since my decision last weekend to not shed another tear over my family situation, I've been feeling better. Of course, I still think about them - they are my family after all; but I'm not upset and no longer feel hurt or guilt about it. I guess I just needed to let myself off the hook and realize that just because we don't get along doesn't make it my fault or make me a bad person (man - religious upbringings can wreak havoc with your self-esteem and self-confidence...well, mine did anyway).

3 comments:

angela said...

You have been busy! When my life isn't going the way I want I usually tweak my blog, it's a control thing, I guess.
I know what you mean about the religion thing. I was brought up a Catholic and as H. says, I majored in guilt! I even feel guilty for stuff that has nothing to do with me!
Angela

Manda Girl said...

I'm so glad you are feeling better! the holidays are tough for those types of thoughts and feelings too. It's good to focus on you and your life with H! :)

PS - I posted my 4 things, finally!

Kari said...

Strange, isn't it, how easily guilt seems to be attached to religion. It makes no sense to me.