Get Ready!

I hope you all are getting ready for NaBloPoMo tomorrow. I have to remember to post EVERY day for the month of November. I have a few posts I'm planning on writing - you know...the things I should have been blogging about since we took K to the Predator game last Thursday.

If you haven't signed up to be part of the NaBloPoMo madness yet, please follow the link on the right. It's incredibly easy. If you blog each day of the month, your name goes into a drawing for prizes (notice prizes is PLURAL). :-)

Until later...

Answering Comments and such

I've noticed that some people have been coming to my blog looking for Weight Watcher Point Values and wanting good foods that are fast and easy to prepare.

Here are a few of my favorites...
1. McDonald's Grilled Chicken Wrap with honey mustard (6 points)
2. Baked BBQ Lay's Potato Chips (3 points)
3. California Turkey Roll from Roly Poly with whole wheat wrap (6 points)
4. 6-inch turkey/ham sandwich from Subway on Honey Oat with honey mustard, cucumbers, lettuce, olives, and provolone cheese(7 points)
5. Cinnamon Raisin Oatmeal to go Bars (4 points)
6. Chocolate/Oatmeal Breakfast Cookies (3 points)
7. Dairy Queen Grilled chicken Salad (no bacon, no buttered toast) (5 points)
8. Starbucks Iced Venti Sugar-free Caramel Non-fat Latte (2 points) *with 2% milk (4 points)

I'll post more as I think of them.

By the way, I lost .6 pounds this week. That brings my total to 13.2 pounds. WooHoo! Until later...

Gross!!

I know that it's been a few days since I have blogged. I have a lot of things I've been meaning to blog about, but just haven't found the time yet. Work is currently crazy as we get ready for homecoming. I think NaBloPoMo is going to kick my ass, but I am still going to give it a try starting Thursday. I can use that time to blog about the things that I haven't had a chance to blog yet.

You might hate me for this blog, but I have to do it. Sorry. :-)

Okay, I know that EVERYONE picks their nose. Be honest! You know you do. I pick mine, but I’m very particular about where I am when I pick my nose. I am also very aware of who is around me when I pick my nose.

I’ll pick my nose anywhere in my house even with H right beside me. He started it! I may pick my nose when I’m in my car, but ONLY when there are no other cars around me.

This story begins at lunch. Just like every day during lunch, I park in one of our parking lots, sit in my car, and eat my lunch. Some days I’m tired enough to recline my seat and close my eyes (I haven’t enjoyed that luxury in a while). Today, I go through my usual routine. Other people have found my spot! Damn it! There was a gentleman sitting in his car the very next row over (actually parked the slot next to mine, but the spot diagonal from my car). I pulled through the spot next to his so I’m looking at grass instead of a parking lot full of cars (I find that much more enjoyablea nd relaxing). Not five minutes after I pull in, a woman in a black car pulls between my car and the grass (perpendicular to my car) instead of in a parking spot. She sits there for a few minutes and PICKS her nose. I don’t mean a normal “my nose is itching on the inside” sort of pick. This woman was DIGGING FOR GOLD. She must have been amazed when she came up without gold because she KEPT.LOOKING.AT.HER.FINGER (after EVERY SINGLE pick). I was so tempted to honk my horn and wave at her to let her know she got caught. Finally, she looks around and sees me in my car. She backs up a bit so she can actually park in a spot. I have no idea what took her so long to park (besides the digging for gold thing). There were plenty of parking spots all along the last row (which is where I was). I’m so glad I hadn’t started eating yet. I was grossed out enough as it was. By the way, you know I HAD to call H and tell him what I saw. HAHA!!

Wish me luck for my weigh in after work today. :-) Until later...

Had to get in my post for the day. :-)

Not a lot to say today. We’re going to be taking K to a Predator game tonight. We’re really looking forward to it.

Before today, I was only able to get into my size 16 jeans. Today, I am in a size 16 trouser and I FEEL GREAT!!! They are extremely comfortable and were one of my favorite pairs before I could no longer wear them. I’m looking forward to trying on more of my smaller clothes this weekend to see what I can add to my current wardrobe.
WooHoo!

Until later...

Happy Hump Day!!

I had a pretty good week this week. I can’t complain. 3 good things that happened this week (okay, so there’s 4):

1. I ate a Butterfinger - a WHOLE Butterfinger. It was worth EVERY damn point (it was only 6 points for the whole bar)

2. I have not let SUB get to me this week for some reason. I’m actually finding her antics to be rather funny, strange and unreasonable, but funny.

3. The pictures for my office are ready for pick-up at Hobby Lobby. I will be getting them tomorrow.

4. I lost .4 pounds this week even though I snacked quite a bit.

Until later...

Darn it!

I’ve been doing so well blogging every day and I missed yesterday. Sorry. I’ve actually been trying to make it a habit to blog every day especially since I have joined NaBloPoMo which starts next week.

Anyway, WWAWP update. Keep in mind that I ate like a fiend this past weekend. I stayed pretty close to my points and didn’t go over by much. Some of the stuff I ate was REALLY hard to figure out the points, but I did the best I could. I may not have made healthy choices, but I did make choices to eat less than I would have when I wasn’t on Weight Watchers. I still lost. WooHoo! I lost .4 pounds, but it is still a loss so I can’t and won’t complain about it.

This program has been VERY good for me. I have become extremely aware of what I eat and the choices I make. Now if I can only get into an exercise regimen, I’d be doing great. We have an elliptical trainer at home. The problem for me is that you are moving your body weight and I don’t have the stamina to stay on the damn thing more than 5 minutes at a time. Five minutes a day is still pretty good when you consider it’s better than nothing. Eventually, I should be able to stay on longer each week if I keep it up. I think I’ll start with that when I get home from work tonight. It’s not like I have to move it or pull it out or anything. I’m just too lazy to get my fat ass off the sofa and away from the TV long enough to do it.

H and I will be going grocery shopping tonight as soon as he gets home from work. I get home about 30 minutes before he does, so I can get on the machine during that time. Last night, I finally got off my lazy butt and colored my hair. I have needed to do that for about a month now. I just haven’t done it. We’ve been busy, I’ve been tired, or I just didn’t feel like doing my hair at that time. It only takes 35 minutes from start to finish, but there are nights that I didn’t want to mess with wet hair, so I put it off until another day. My hair is now a dark brown which is really close to my natural hair that shows when my roots grow out. The only difference is that now I have covered the GRAY! Yep, I’ve got ‘em in spades! I get it from my paternal grandmother.

She was salt/pepper (mostly salt) before she was 42. I will be 39 later this year, so I know where I get the gray. I’ve had some gray in my hair since I was 16, but now it is much more noticeable and I just can’t have that. I always remembered thinking that my grandma was old when in reality, she was close to my age when I was born, but she was already mostly white. Since I thought she was old looking back at the pictures and from my memory, I didn’t want people to have that same impression of me, so I’ve been coloring my hair for quite some time now.

I have always tried to closely match my natural hair color so it will look as natural as possible. Thankfully, the grays don’t take color quite as well as the rest, so it looks like I have a few different shades in my hair which looks most natural. I have noticed that my roots are getting extremely dark compared to what they were years ago so I have gone from a medium brown to a dark brown hair color.

So that’s my update and what I should have blogged about yesterday. Until later...

Let's Call it What it is...

Today is Monday! Nothing was out of the ordinary today. Staff meeting at 8:30, answered phones all day, took reservations for our upcoming events, and that's about it. We've got a lot going on at work because of one of our events (it's got multiple parts to it). Even though I wrote that I only took reservations and answered phones all day, I really did a lot more than that. Today was busy, but in a good way. I actually like Mondays at work.

SUB was SUB. She really needs to learn some basic manners like saying "Thank-you" when someone gives you a message or does something for you. Instead I got a blank stare and she just left. I thought it was kind of funny. I'm finding her actions interesting. I bet her mom would be so disappointed that her "southern" belle didn't learn the manners that are so ingrained in the south. Her grandmother would be more suprised since she is a true "southern belle." I am so understanding why she's single and isn't dating anyone which, of course, would make her the bitter SUB she is. It's such a vicious circle. :-)

I paid a doctor's bill during lunch as well as tried something new from McDonald's. I tried their Grilled Chicken Snack Wrap with Honey Mustard. It was GREAT! For dinner, I ordered the same thing, but they gave it to me with Ranch dressing. The Honey Mustard was MUCH better.

Wish me luck with WWAWP tomorrow. I am expecting that I have either remained the same or possibly even gained a pound. I have really been in a snacking mood the last few days. I haven't eaten more points than I had to use (using some of my 35 points, but I still have about 15 or so left for use) so I may be in MUCH better shape than I think. I'll find out tomorrow.

Until later...

Life Choices this Weekend

Okay, so you know how Weight Watchers has you keep track of what you eat and how many points each food is worth? Well, Friday, I accidentally left my "QuikTrak System" at work on my desk. It's actually inside my daytimer which I left at work by accident.

Thankfully, I knew how many points I had left for Friday and we were planning on going to Cracker Barrel for dinner. Since I get the "vegetable platter," I knew exactly how many points I needed for dinner (1 for the green beans, 1 for the baby carrots, 1 for the applesauce, and 3 for the macaroni and cheese - what!? I can't be perfect all the time). Normally, the green beans and carrots are free, but since they seem to be cooked in oil or butter, I subtract one point for each just to be on the safe side and I have them keep the bread in the back so I'm not tempted.

So, Saturday, I did my best to write down everything I ate along with the amount of points each was worth. These foods included a Subway 6-inch Turkey and Ham with a bag of BBQ Baked Lays. We went to a college football game that afternoon (we actually got there at the end of the first quarter and left at the end of the third quarter because my BIL and H's cousin had to work a party at the family restaurant). I really didn't eat much at the game. I had less than a handful of popcorn and a bite of a hotdog. That bite of hotdog put me into heaven. It was that good.

The party was for a close friend of H's family. He took a trip to Laos a few months ago. He had a cut on his leg before he left and because they have different viruses than we do, his leg became extremely infected. He has been on his back or in a hospital for the past 4 months. He is finally up and walking around again (he had to learn to walk all over again). This party was in celebration of him getting better and to bestow a blessing on him and his family for continued good health and healing.

At the party, I had 1 fried chicken wing, 1 fried chicken drumstick, about 1/2 a cup of chicken LoMein, 3 brownie bites, 1 bite of another type of dessert, and about 1/4 cup of steamed white rice. It was VERY difficult to figure out the points for all of that, but I don't think I went too far over my points for the day. Actually, I anticipate that I went over by about 5 points. Since I had used less than 10 of my extra 35 points for the week up until this point, I'm in pretty good shape (besides, those 35 points gets started again on Wednesday).

For the past few weeks, I have been CRAVING Munchkins from Dunkin Donuts. I have especially been wanting the blueberry cake Munchkins. So today, after eating about 1/2 cup of potato salad, we went to Subway for lunch before hitting Dunkin Donuts. Sadly, they were out of the blueberry cake Munchkins, but at least they had the glazed chocolate cake, the powered sugar, the cinnamon sugar, and the jelly filled Munchkins. I have already had 3 of the glazed chocolate cake Munchkins and 3 of the Jelly filled Munchkins. Yeah, I've gone over my points for the day, but I'm still far from using just over half of my 35 extra points for the week.

This is actually the first time I have really had a rough time while on Weight Watchers, but I have found that I am still making pretty good choices especially when it comes to how much I am eating. I love the fact that there is no food off limits or "bad" I just need to know how many points to attribute to each food. Before Weight Watchers, I would have had 2 regular size donuts today; and yesterday, I would have had a whole bucket of popcorn and a whole hotdog at the game. I also would have eaten a whole lot more at the party. I may not have made good choices when it came to what I ate this weekend, but I did make good choices in regards to how much I ate. I still did pretty well and am still proud of myself.

I hope you all have a great week. Until later...

Emerging with Realization and Understanding

Even though I have heard from many people throughout my life that I have a lot of inner strength, I never believed it because I knew my insecurities and they didn't seem to see those. Yeah, I knew what I had been through in my life and that I survived it all (and in all honesty, the people telling me I had inner strength actually had no clue as to what I had been through), but in my mind and eyes, I came out of those situations a broken, lonely, unlovable, and deeply scarred individual. I figured that if those people only knew everything about me and my past, they would have a different view not only of my "inner strength" but also of me as a person.

I woke up this morning realizing that I have completely sold myself short. I realized and understood for the first time that I actually came out of all those situations a winner and with more strength than I or anyone else could ever understand or imagine. I survived! I made it! Not only did I make it, but I came out ahead. I came out of all that crap with my trust and faith in humanity in tact. That in itself is no small feat when you realize and understand that I learned at the age of 4 that I couldn't even trust my own family to protect me from the big bad world (hell, one of them was the Big Bad FRICKIN' Wolf). With all of that in my past and a part of who I am, I still give everyone the benefit of the doubt in EVERY situation when it comes to their actions and the motives behind their actions.

I also realized this morning that even though I have to take a DAM, I am taking the lowest dosage that is prescribed which means that I can handle the majority of EVERYTHING on my own inner strength. I only need help with the small amount I can't handle on my own. I wonder if I didn't have the chemical imbalance if I'd be able to handle all of it on my own (not that it really matters since I do have the imbalance). Actually, with everything I have been through, it's kind of amazing that I only need a small dose of my DAM. It's not a disgrace to realize that you need help in handling situations. That thought alone made me realize this morning that I am MUCH stronger than I originally thought and put a huge smile on my face.

Until later...

TGIF!!!

Thank God it’s Friday! This has been a very tiring week. Last night, H came home from work with a dozen pink carnations! Carnations are my favorite flower. It was so sweet of him and so unexpected. He said they were because he was so proud of me not only because I have been doing so well on my new, healthier lifestyle, but because I am also inspiring him to make healthier choices. He said he really needs to start taking care of his health better. I have not been pushing him or saying anything to him. He’s been saying for months now that he needs to lose weight, but he still makes the same unhealthy choices and forget all about portion control. He’ll get it when he’s ready. Living healthier and losing weight is something a person has to be ready to do. No one can push you into it. It has to be on your own time and on your own terms. That’s the only way it will work and you’ll see lasting results. It has to be something you can LIVE with.

On another note, remember those jeans I tried on last week and could button and zip, but they were a little too tight to actually be considered decent in public? I am wearing them today. All day! It’s fantastic! I can’t remember the last time I wore these pants. I really need to go through all of my clothes this weekend and try on the smaller sizes. The ones I’m wearing now are getting too baggy and are not looking good at all. It’s like getting a whole new wardrobe without having to pay a cent. That’s my kind of shopping.

I hope you all have a great weekend! Until later...

I need to remember to say, “And good morning to you, too”

I need to remember to say, “And good morning to you, too” to SUB. :-) She came in my building this morning. She said "hello" or "good morning" to MIO and NGIO, put mail in the mail tray ON MY DESK (so hello! She sees me sitting BEHIND MY DESK), picked up yesterday’s mail OFF MY DESK asking me (this is the first she’s spoken to me or even looked at me today) if the other mail belonged to EA, and went to talk to MB. When she saw that MB was not in her office, she turns to me and says, “Where is she?” I REALLY need to remember to say at moments like these, “And good morning to you, too.” LOL

It's not bothering me that she isn't saying hello because I know it's just because she's a BITCH and doesn't know how to treat people, but I AM going to enjoy this. That's my plan for tomorrow.

Once again, I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and ASSUME (Ass-U-Me?) that she's never really worked with secretaries before. EVERYBODY knows if you want something done in an office and you want it professional to give it to a secretary. The people who have the ear of the bosses is the person working the closest with them on a daily basis. Guess what? That's the secretary. I'm going to start enjoying my role a little more now that I know it's just who she is, maybe see if I can teach an old dog new tricks - like general manners and pleasantries. HAR!HAR!HAR!

Until later...

Happy Hump Day!!!

It's Wednesday again, and I almost forgot. Shame on me. haha.

Okay, so 3 good things that happened to me this week:

1. I finally figured out SUB's character and motivation for her actions. :-)

2. I have now lost a total of 12.2 pounds and keeping it off.

3. I haven't allowed SUB to get to me this week. WooHoo! (#1 helped a LOT with #3). Now I can just dismiss her and her actions. I'm surprised I hadn't figured her out before. Better late than never.

That's all I can think of at the moment. Until later...

Still a Magnet for Bad Drivers

To the jackass in the Comcast van riding up my ass, this post is for you.

The sign stated "lane ends, merge right." What part of that did you NOT understand. I was IN the right hand lane. I couldn't merge right or I would be driving on the damn sidewalk. That sign (although on the right side of the road) was meant for YOU!!!

Did you see the sign? Did you read the sign? Can you read? It really wasn't that difficult. Not only did I have the right of way, but I was partially in front of you by the time we got to the point in the road where YOU were supposed to merge (and I didn't speed to get in front of you).

What did your pea brain tell you to do at that point? Act like an asshole riding my bumper blaring your horn non-stop for the next two blocks. You really need to keep those impulses in check because you are just showing what a JackAss you are and showing your lack of reading ability and comprehension. Next time, please read the sign and realize that I had the right of way and YOU were in the wrong.

To [the stupid (only the stupid)] TN drivers out there, when the sign says to "merge" when you're getting onto the freeway, that does NOT mean stop until it's clear. Merge also does NOT mean that you have the right of way to move into traffic on the highway without even looking to see if someone is coming or already in your lane. For heaven's sake "merge" means you go with the flow of traffic. That means MATCHING SPEED and go when it's safe. You're the idiots causing all the traffic accidents in the morning. What is with these people who think they ALWAYS have the right of wayn no matter the situation? You're as bad as the jackass behind me this evening.

Learn how to drive, MORONS!
***********
Now onto WWAWP update. I LOST 1.2 pounds this week. That takes my total loss to 12.2 pounds. WooHoo! It's been a lot easier for me to make healthier choices. Realizing how many points something is worth has really helped in my decision making. The things I used to love just aren't worth the points. I only get 23 a day. I don't want to waste them, you know. haha

My problem is that I HATE to exercise and haven't found anything I enjoy doing yet. Any suggestions? What do you do for exercise?

Until later...

Realizations Since Friday

1. I have known for a long time that not everyone will like me, but I have always had a problem realizing that I don’t have to like everyone either. It is extremely hard for me to give up or change habits. This is one habit I have had for as long as I can remember. Be nice and kind to everyone and they will be nice and kind to you. It’s that whole, living up to high expectations that I have done since I was a small girl. SUB doesn’t like me, that’s fine; but I don’t have to like her either. And I don’t!

2. I have always had a Pollyanna outlook on life. You know what I’m talking about – always looking through rose-colored glasses, always seeing the glass as half-full, that sort of thing. I think that’s one reason I am always so shocked when someone acts counter balance of that image.

3. You see, I also tend to always expect to see the best side of everyone just as I have tried for years to always show the best side of me (I have fallen short of that on occasion, but mostly, I do keep those tacky parts to myself especially these past few years – that doesn’t mean I won’t blog about what’s bothering me because this is my journal and the best way I have found to get out the things that are bothering me without letting them fester or keep me down).

4. I am finally realizing that not everyone has a BEST side and realizing that sometimes their best side is really no different than their Bitch side. Not all people are nice, friendly, or worth spending a lot of time around. I am learning to accept that and to realize that this is just the way some people are; you see, I tend to excuse away bad behavior by thinking their just having a bad day, when in reality, they have a bad personality, probably hate their lives, and suck the life out of everything around them with their negativity. I don’t need that in my life and I don’t want that in my life. Hence, whatever is thrown at me will no longer bother me. With this mindset, I can actually brush it off and chock it up to the fact that you’re just the way you are, you aren’t going to change, and it really has NOTHING to do with me but everything to do with you (you know I’m talking about SUB here).

5. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and am way too trusting for my own good. You would think with everything I have been through in my lifetime that I would, at the very least, have learned that people need to earn my trust before I so freely give it away. Unfortunately, that is not how I operate. I trust blindly and willingly those that I barely know. It’s no wonder I get my feelings hurt when you show me you really don’t deserve my trust or my friendship and sometimes show that you don’t want my friendship. No one ever asks for my friendship or trust (in actions – I really don’t expect this to be literal). The first day I meet you, you already have those things from me until you hurt me to the point that I can’t take anymore. At that point, I take back my friendship and trust and, chances are, you will never see them again. A good example – SUB! I have been here for 9 months taking her crap. I’m done! I understand she is the way she is and I accept that, but I am no longer going to go out of my way to be her friend or help her and there’s no way I’ll trust her or her friendship again. As it is now, there are days that she’s really nice and sweet, then all of a sudden, and for no good reason, she turns into a viper. I’m no longer going to bend backwards to figure out your moods or try to make your life simpler in any way. I will do my job to the best of my ability as I always have, but I will no longer go out of my way to help you, befriend you, or trust you.

And those are my recent revelations. Until later...

Eyeliner Tip

If you're looking for a deep post today, you'll have to find another blog. :-) I've been meaning to write about this great eyelining tip I found on a website about a month ago (I can't remember, but I think it was MSN or Yahoo). I have been trying this tip since then and, amazingly, it is working. I couldn't belive it. I have finally found a way to keep eyeliner on my eyes ALL.DAY.LONG. Normally, my eyeliner wears off long before lunch. I have tried eyeliner pencils and liquid eyeliner. Nothing stays on all day, or even half the day. The tip was that if you have oily skin or live in an area with heat and you sweat during the day, then you should use eye shadow as your liner. Luckily, my eyebrow brush has an eyeliner brush at the end of it, so I've been using the eyeliner brush to put a taupe eye shadow around my eyes. It has stayed on all day! I've even gone to sleep with it still on my eyes and have gotten up in the morning with the eye shadow still rimming my eyes. If you ever have a problem with eyeliner staying on your eyes, try eye shadow. It really works!

Until later...

Saturday Update

Today was an extremely lazy day. H worked from yesterday morning at 8:00 until 11:00 this afternoon. Yep, I stayed in bed practically all day. The events of yesterday kept playing through my mind all day.

I checked my work mail a few minutes ago and I had an email from MB. She said that I should just start stamping the mail and not opening it. She also stated that she didn't understand why BB was having me open all the mail anyway. I understand that it can seem an invasion of privacy for someone else to open your mail. What I didn't appreciate was the way in which SUB handled the situation. It wasn't what she said; it was how she said it and the anger on her face. I put all of this in my reply to MB's email. I also let MB know that just because I open all the mail does not mean I read all the mail. I have been doing this for many years at other companies (bigger companies) and I've NEVER had the reaction I did from SUB yesterday. The bold part I did not include in my email, but the rest I did.

Another thing going through my head was the fact that SUB has gone from talking about the "golf cart episode" to talking about the fact that next Fall I "need" to get three student workers instead of two. I can't wait for the next time she says something to me about that. This fall, I DID have three students; but she had a problem with one of them and didn't want him working in our office, so now we're down to two. That's not my fault, but I don't think she remembers that. Because we weren't told who our workers were until 3 weeks before the semester started, when they took the one worker away, they had no one to replace him with. This year, they had about 30 positions that they couldn't fill with students. Hopefully, we won't have that problem next fall.

I also think I have figured out why SUB treats me the way she does. She just turned 33 this year and took a hard look at her life. She realized that all she has in her life is her job, two cats, and a nephew that lives 500 miles away. She mentioned that she wonders if she will ever find the right person to settle down and have a family with (with her attitude and personality - lots of luck!). I have those things and I've had them for the past 10 years. This means I was 28 when I married H and he is a GREAT man. What she doesn't realize is just because I don't complain about him at work, doesn't mean we haven’t had our problems.

Hell, our 10th anniversary was this past March. Did I get a gift? No! Did I get a card? No! Grant it, he had a lot going on at work and was extremely stressed (remember his hair loss episode?); but it was a BIG milestone. Did I get him a gift? Hell Yeah! Was I extremely hurt? Of course I was! Did anyone at work know about this situation? Nope! I didn't say a word to them. A few days after our anniversary, he emailed me a poem he was going to take to Kinko's to get blown up and framed. To this day, I still only have the copy I printed from his email.

She doesn't realize that he and I are both different than the people we were ten years ago. We have helped each other, smoothed each other's rough edges, and had days we both wanted to call it quits; but we didn't. In the end, we have both been really good for the other. I put a lot of work into this relationship. I haven't tried to change him in any way; he's just grown up and made some changes on his own. He laughs and smiles a whole lot more now than when I first met him. He is a lot happier, and according to him, a lot if that has to do with me and my love. Isn't that sweet? :-)

Besides the EA, I'm the only one in the office who has been in a relationship longer than 2 years. EA is somewhere in her late 50's early 60's. She may even be a little older, I'm not really sure. I understand that if you're only looking at my life from the outside it looks pretty damn good, especially since I am really good in showing people a happy face even when that is the last thing I'm feeling. She has no idea the things I have been through in my life because of my parents, brother, grandfather, sexual harassment at work, etc. over the years. In all honesty, I envy SUB the closeness of her family. I've always wanted that in my own, but it has never happened and I realize that it never will. I just have to accept them for the people they are.

Anyway, I am so going to try to not let her get to me. I wish I weren't so sensitive. I don't know how to change that, I've tried for years. I really need to find a way to work through these types of situation without getting so hurt. Maybe that's why I always end up working with one person like this. I still haven't learned to toughen up and just let go.

I'm trying. Thanks, Amanda for all your kind words and encouragement through all of this. I really appreciate your point of view and everything you've taken the time to tell me.

Anyway, so today was a pretty good day even though I got absolutely NOTHING accomplished around the house, I did get things accomplished in my head and heart.

Until later...

SUB Strikes - AGAIN!

I am so freakin’ pissed right now. When SUB picked up her mail a few minutes ago, she noticed it was opened. She asked, "Why is this opened if it has my name on it?" I told her, "Because BB told me to open and date-stamp every piece of mail we receive." I’ve been at this job for 9 damn months! NINE!! Every day my job entails me to open and date-stamp EVERY piece of mail we receive. TODAY, for some strange reason, SUB had a problem with me opening mail addressed to her. I’ve been doing this for 9 MONTHS and today it bothers you?! WTF!! Seriously! Has she not noticed all the other days that her mail is opened and stamped? Hello! Just because I OPEN all the mail, does not mean I READ all the mail.

The bad part about this situation is that I am the only one in my office at the moment so I can’t really vent to my boss and she didn’t witness the whole thing (she’s been a witness to the other ways SUB treats me and has always come to my defense – have I told you how much I LOVE my boss?). I sent an email to MB. This is what it said, “Do people in the office not realize part of my job is to open and date-stamp ALL mail? I’ve been doing this for 9 months and [SUB] had a problem with me opening mail addressed to her today. I told her that I would no longer open her mail, but would date stamp the envelope from now on. Thought you should know.” Seeing as how that IS part of my job, I wanted my boss to know why I am no longer doing it. What a BITCH (not MB – SUB)!

I absolutely hate when little Miss Priss (SUB) cops an attitude. I’m glad people in her position usually only stay here for 2-3 years and I hope she moves on to greener pastures at that time instead of sticking around in our office. That sentiment may be mean, but I really don’t give a flying shit right now.

Thursday

SUB is under the impression that we need 3 student workers during the Fall semester and possibly 3 during the Spring semester. I have a few issues with that. First of all, there have been days that our workers have had NOTHING to do. Why have three workers that are bored or get sent home early instead of two? Secondly, I ask for the number of workers that my BOSS tells me we need. Thirdly, I did ask for three workers this Fall, but SUB and MB had issues with one of the guys we were given because of his lack of work ethic. Fourthly, SUB states that the workers are working too slowly. They have finished most everything in a pretty timely manner. There was only ONE thing that I needed to finish because they didn't. They are working on her project right now, and this project doesn’t even have to be completed until the LAST week of November. They started it yesterday. They’re here for a total of ten hours each week between the two of them. They will have them done in PLENTY of time. We do have a BUNCH of grab bags that they will need to put together, but we aren't ready for them to start on those yet. Her project will get doen with lots of time to spare.

On another note, Mom’s WWB (Weight Watcher Buddy) isn’t helping her too much. WWB is on Weight Watchers with her husband. She is not losing as much weight as she would like or as much weight as Mom. That is completely understandable because each person loses weight at their own rate. She would lose a lot more weight if she actually worked Weight Watchers the way you’re supposed to. She doesn’t limit her portions to the correct amount. She continues to make fattening desserts. Once she’s finished eating one meal, she’s already thinking and talking about food. She is obsessed with food and talks about it constantly. She tries to push Mom into taking some of the desserts home on the pretext that it’s for Grandma, but she shouldn’t do that. Mom is doing great especially with her best friend being the food pusher/enabler that she is.

Mom has lost 13 pounds so far and still going strong. I continue to call her each week and try to encourage her and support her as much as I can. I know how important it is for her emotionally as well as for her health. She is using Weight Watcher’s Core Plan and loves it. Mom has a hard enough time at home with Dad and Grandma (who both eat sweets and snack constantly). She definitely does not need her WWB/BF giving her more temptation. WWB/BF left Tuesday for an 18-day cruise. I have no clue how she’s going to work Weight Watchers while she’s on the cruise. She went with Mom to a quilt retreat a few weekends ago and didn’t limit her food or make good choices either day. That was only 2 days! Now she’s going to be gone for 18! This lady kills me. She had gastro-bypass surgery years ago and has had nothing but health problems for the past ten years, but she doesn’t change her habits. She is as big now, maybe bigger, than she was before her surgery. I really think she needs to talk to a professional regarding her addiction (that’s the best way to explain it – an addiction).

New subject! I will be watching K2 this Saturday while the rest of the family is working a party at the restaurant. K will probably be there, too. He likes to help and loves to be with his dad. That’s fine.

H will be working late Friday night and possibly Saturday depending on how things are going. They are moving their data center this weekend from an outside source to their building. H has been put in charge of it. They are giving H more responsibilities at work. I think they are grooming him for a manager position. They have mentioned it to him in the past and wanted him to step up. At his company, they want to see you work the job before they give you the title and salary that go with the job. It’s kind of ridiculous because they want him to help others be more efficient, but he has no authority over them so they could easily get offended. That hasn’t happened yet, which is good, but it is sometimes frustrating for H and I can understand that. Hence, just one more reason, I love secretarial work! I’m good at it and I have very little stress. Sure, my paycheck is just as small as my stress level, but that’s okay. We don’t really need the money I bring home. We’ve been living on one paycheck for the past six years while H and I were both in school. What my paycheck does is pay my student loan and give us a little breathing room during the month (not a lot of breathing room, but enough so we feel comfortable and don’t feel deprived of anything).

We are working on lowering our debt and finally getting that paid off. It will take us a few years the way we are going, but we’re okay with that. We want to enjoy life a bit while we’re paying off our debt as opposed to scrimping so much that we feel guilty for going out to dinner once in a while, taking in a movie, or even taking K to the store for a toy. I will be getting a bonus in my next check, so we will be using that for Christmas gifts. It should be pretty easy this year.

Our gift list is as follows:

G – gift card to Wal-mart

M – gift card to Bath and Body

W, A, and B – gift cards to Toys ‘R’ Us

Dad – gift card to Wal-mart

Mom – gift card to fabric store

Grandma – See’s candy (her favorites are the “soft centers” and toffee)

Grandpa – cash (he doesn’t understand the concept of gift cards and thinks
the store is cheating him – always!)
K – toys

K2 – rattle, clothes

H – new headset for his computer (it seems there was something else, too;
but I can’t think of it right now. Maybe I’ll think of it before
Christmas)

H's parents, brother, and SIL - we have no idea yet what to get them, but it
always gets done.

*By the way, my family gets gift cards because we aren't with them for Christmas and it's much easier to mail gift cards than anything else. :-)

Happy Hump Day!!!

My good blog-friend Manda has started what she calls "Hooray for Hump Day." To read her reasoning, follow this link.

I really like her reasoning. She's right. There are times that I do use this space to blow off steam, to bitch, to moan and groan about whatever may be bothering me at the moment. There are times I use this space to help me put things into perspective and to get a better understanding of life's issues.

So...this week, 3 good things that happened to me:

1. I was able to cross my legs like a normal woman for the first time in years on Thursday. Normally, I have been crossing my legs with my ankle over my knee like a man, I cross them at the ankles, or I don't cross them at all. I don’t have to do that any more. WooHoo!

2. My size 18 pants are baggy on me – sadly, I am currently in between sizes because my 16s are still a little too tight, but at least I can get them zipped, buttoned, and buckled; they just don't look pretty.

3. Lost 3 pounds this week for a total of 11 pounds. I am now below 190 pounds. WooHoo!

I can't wait to get back down to where I was when I met H 11 years ago. I was 28 years old, so there is no realistic reason that I cannot meet that goal. I wore a size 8 and looked HHOOOOTTT! Not to toot my own horn, but I got much more attention than I EVER wanted when I was that size (which is part of the reason I gained my weight). I was sexually harrassed at work and VERY uncomfortable with all the attention even though I had always been that size. I had moved out of CA, and the men treated me in a manner much different from what I was used to (I had been extremely sheltered all my life up to that point). I had no idea how to handle the situation I found myself in and got scared. I ended up trying to hide by gaining weight. You know, people REALLY do treat you differently and tend to overlook you completely when you're overweight (which is an extremely sad commentary on our society).

Anyway, so those are the 3 happy things that happened to me this past week.

Until next week...

Pissed Off – Hurt Feelings??

I’m not really sure how I feel about this situation...

Yesterday at lunch, I called Mom because I had a feminine health question that REALLY had me worried. When she answered the phone, she said she had G on the other line trying to help her get her laptop running. First of all, she called H earlier in the week regarding the same issue. H is a network administrator and has set up my parent’s computers, network, the whole shebang. H couldn’t help her and said that it sounded like the same problem they had a few months ago regarding interference and it would clear itself in time and that there wasn’t anything that could be done for it. She calls G who has no computer training, just his own experience to rely on. That kind of pissed me off. I didn’t dare tell H that mom went to G for a second opinion (I was worried that he would get his feelings hurt and I couldn’t blame him – hell, I was upset and she didn’t even question my judgment or knowledge). Heeellllloooo! His opinion is the only one that is professional. If the person who works on computers all day long, every day of the week, couldn’t fix your problem, how in the hell can you expect some "nobody" with no computer training whatsoever to fix the same problem? I just don’t understand that thinking whatsoever.

Anyway, so Mom asked if she could call me back. I told her I only had a health question, but sure, you can call me back. I was at lunch, so I knew that if she didn’t call me back within the hour, I would have to wait to call her again after work. Needless to say, I had to call her after work. I asked her if G was able to fix her problem. Her answer…”Nope.” Serves her right. I hope she’s without that damn thing until we come up for Thanksgiving. Mean of me? Yeah, I know. I’m okay with that. Besides, it isn’t like she doesn’t have a desktop computer she can use for the same things with a TV in that room, so she would only be deprived of her comfy recliner. A

nyway, I finally told her what my question was and she said, “Well, why didn’t you tell me it was a health question?” I told her, "I did." She said that she must not have heard me and that I didn’t sound stressed or worried, so it didn’t come across as important. WHATEVER!!!

Until later…

Tuesday Weigh In

So, this week I drank extra water to help keep me from retaining fluids (you know..because my scales are less than 1 pound off from Weight Watcher's scales, but I'm heavier in the afternoon). Instead of drinking 4-8 glasses of water a day, this week, I've been drinking anywhere from 8-12 glasses of water a day.

So, I step on the scale today and I have lost....3 pounds this week. That brings my total weight loss so far to 11 pounds. WooHoo!

I've been making much healthier food choices. Each morning, I eat a Quaker Oatmeal to go Bar (4 points). I may or may not stop at Starbucks on my way to work and get an Iced Venti Sugar-Free Caramel Non-fat Latte (2 points - by the way, getting the same drink with 2% milk brings the total points to 4 - It's not worth the 2 extra points for the 2% milk). Each week day, for lunch, I get a grilled chicken salad with fat-free dressing (5 points). Dinner varies, but by the time dinner rolls around, I have already had 2 full milk servings and 3 vegetables. Some days I eat some cheese or a banana for snack while at work which gives me an additional milk and/or fruit/vegetable serving.

Not too shabby. I've got to say that I'm still really excited about all of this. I am making healthier choices, I'm able to keep up with K, I can now cross my legs again, and I can bend over while sitting to paint my toenails without having to sit up to take a breath. :-) I'm looking forward to the time when I will fit in my next lower size clothes. I am now below 190 pounds. WooHoo!

Until later...

Monday

Mondays lately have been great. I may not be able to get out of bed in the morning without hitting the snooze button 2-3 times, but they're not too bad all in all. Work starts at 8, but we have a staff meeting at 8:30 that lasts until 9:30-10 sometimes later depending on what's going on. Lunch is at 12:30, so my mornings go extremely quickly. Sometimes, it's hard to keep up with everything I need to do in the morning. Today was one of those days. I even forgot to eat my breakfast until 10:30 this morning.

Sometimes, Monday afternoons can go pretty slowly, but never to the point where I'm bored, restless, or the days go extremely slow. For me, this is great. Normally, I get bored in a job after about 6 months and I'm ready to move on to something else (even if it's just another department within the same company). I've been in this position for 9 months now and I haven't had that feeling once. WooHoo! Maybe I have finally found the right job for me.

On another note, I love my Corolla. It's a 4-cylinder, but it drives like a 6 or 8-cylinder. I have to say...this is the first 4-cylinder I have ever owned. The first few thousand miles (you know, the ones where you aren't supposed to take the car above 55mph so the engine gets nice and primed) KILLED me. I hated those miles. I was ready to go! I bought a red car. It was my first brand new car and I couldn't even drive it (okay, in all fairness, I could drive it, but driving below the speed limit just goes against the grain for me. It's like nails on a chalk board). It took me a while to get used to the lack of power. Lately, I think my corolla has adjusted to my way of driving. I can drive the wheels off this sucker. It's great! I beat other cars off the line at a stop light without even trying. My car has definitely adjusted to my way of driving instead of my driving adjusting to the lack of cylinders. WooHoo!

I guess it's the racing in my blood that has me driving like this. I don't know how else to explain it. I really do have racing in my blood (I swear!). Both of my uncles on my mom's side raced stock cars the whole time I was growing up. Every year on vacation, we'd go to whichever track they were racing (N. CA, or S. OR whichever track was running that night - some weekends we went to both tracks) and watch them race; we even watched them fix the cars up before the race or the day after the race. It was great! I loved it. I was even able to ride around the track with one of my uncles driving top speed. It was fantastic! Bobby Allison even drove one of my uncles cars in a race one time. I wish I could have been there to see it, but it wasn't during one of our vacations. :-( That would have been some memory.

Friday, I found myself making a lane change that rivaled some of the runs you see on NASCAR (you know, where you're in one lane and quickly switch to the other barely squeezing between the car in front of you and the car directly behind you). I couldn't believe I actually did that on the road. Thankfully, I was only going about 45mph because the limit was 40. The only other time I've ever made one of those lane changes was when I was playing one of those NASCAR driving games in the mall. I so rocked! I placed ahead of every man in our party (including my dad and brother). It was AWESOME! Anyway, I love my red Corolla. Anyway, I've been pretty shocked lately to find out that my car has adjusted to me instead of the other way around. I never knew that could or would happen. I'm happy about it, but I think that goes without saying. :-)

Until later...

NaBloPoMo

You may have noticed that I have been blogging a little more frequently. :-) I've been trying to be more consistent in posting. To help in this regard, I have decided to join NaBloPoMo in November. I saw this the middle of November last year (so I was too late to enter for prizes), but this year, I'm going to do it.

Because of NaBloPoMo, I have found MANY blogs that I love to read. You see, each blog in the NaBloPoMo community is put on a list for everyone to see and we are encouraged to visit each other's sites during the month of November. Even though I wasn't part of NaBloPoMo last year, I went to a lot of the blogs. It's a great way to add to your blogroll and see who else is blogging and what they're blogging about. It was very interesting. I look forward to visiting as many sites as possible this year. I even still have last years list in a Word document, so I can still visit those that participated last year.

Join in the fun. It may bring more visitors to your blog. You may find new friends. If you don't already post every day, it may help you develop the habit. Are you in NaBloPoMo? I've just given you 5 links. Have you used any of them yet? :-)

Until later...

Deep Thoughts (Part I)

I've been thinking about this stuff for the past few years, but today a few things clicked and I was actually able to put my thoughts into a few words. This is what I have currently come up with. As I'm able to more of my thoughts into words, you will see those here as well. Please bear with me as I bear my soul and innermost thoughts.

What’s my...Label?

You Are Agnostic

God? Religion? Maybe... you're just not sure. You're still figuring out your spiritual path... or figuring out you really don't care. You believe that no one really can know the true story about religion or God. So you might as well relax a little. You'll go crazy trying make sense of it all.

Are You an Atheist, Agnostic or a Believer?

*Interesting. I really have been trying to figure out my spiritual path for the past few years. If history is written by the winners (and we all know it is), can we really believe anything we read in a book – in ANY book? How can any ONE religion be the right religion? Christianity is the youngest religion in the world. If that is the one true religion, does that mean that everyone who was on this earth before that time is burning in hell? I find that EXTREMELY hard to believe.

I have been trying to figure out my “religious label” for the past few years along with figuring out exactly what it is I believe not what I have been taught to believe. What is my label? Do I really NEED a label? It seems that I must since I keep searching for one that fits what’s been going through my mind but also makes sense and feels comfortable, too.

Do I believe in God? I believe in a higher power whether that Power is named God, Goddess, Buddha, Mohammed, Jehovah, whatever.

Do I believe the Bible is THE word of God? Not really. Does that doom me to an afterlife in hell? As I mentioned earlier, history is written by the winners. King James was a man, a winner, and a king. Who’s to say that the people that translated the Bible into the “King James’ Version” of the Bible didn’t change things in order to please the king? Who’s to say that passages, chapters, or whole books weren’t left out of the original work (does the First Council of Nicaea ring any bells?).

Do I believe that EVERY word in the Bible came directly from God? I really don’t know.
Do I believe that EVERY story in the Bible is literal (except the parables)? Who’s to say that the majority of the stories are not simply parables used to teach valuable lessons? I agree that the Bible teaches many valuable lessons and helps people make sound moral choices and helps them live better lives, but don’t other religions do the exact same thing?

If Christianity is the ONLY true religion, which branch of Christianity is right? Catholic, Church of Christ, Baptist, Methodist, etc.? Which is right? I said it before… How can the youngest religion in the world be the ONLY true religion?

To help me get to the bottom of some of my thoughts and issues regarding religion and beliefs, I have been thinking about majoring in philosophy. Again, that's something else that's been on my mind lately.

Until later...

Great Day!

Today was a great day (for the most part). Crappy news first...

SUB was up to her old tricks again. There are a few ways to pull up information in our system. I use one way, SUB uses another. Every time I can't find something and she can, she tells me that I "need" to look it up in the other format becuase I can pull it up in many different ways. I told her that I can do that in my screen, too, but it is a new feature that I keep forgetting about. Oh well, so I had to ask her to look something up for me. Woop tee doo! I don't mind asking her to do that even if she did have a lot on her plate. She adds stuff to me all the time and acts as though I don't do anything. How little she knows about my job. Yes, I may answer the phones. Yes, I may give tasks to the student workers to complete. Yes, I take ALL reservations for EVERY one of our events including getting payment for each reservation. What takes me the most time is putting profiles together for the VIPs so they will know important information before they actually need it. The other thing that takes me a LOT of time is looking up each person that makes a reservation in our system and verifying that the information they just gave me is the information in our system. If it isn't, I have to highlight the items that need updated so I can send it all to the person that updates our database. Those two things keep me EXTREMELY busy and we are in our busiest time of the year. I currently have 5 events just for this month and 3 for next month that are actually VERY intensive because each person that registers can actually register for about 5 different things in EACH event. Whatever!

Now that I understand that she's just a BITCH by nature, the things she pulls really doesn't bother me that much. I understand her now and I actually enjoy seeing her play the bitch role sometimes (actually, I just like seeing her flustered and trying to push her "knowledge" around like she's a big shot because in my mind, she's anything but). She gets so frustrated and I'm starting to enjoy seeing it even if I end up causing it a few times a month and she aggravates me a bit. I just remind myself that she's overcompensating for her lack of a real life. Does that make me a bitch? Not that I'm going to change. Hey, if she's gonna give me a hard time, I'm gonna have some fun with it and enjoy it occasionally. :-)

Okay...now for the GREAT news...I was sitting in MB's office today. She and I were the only two in either of our buildings the entire afternoon. We had a good afternoon. :-) We were talking in her office and I automatically crossed my legs. I know that's not such a big deal and it happens every day. What's new for me is that I actually crossed them the way a woman crosses her legs. I haven't been able to do that in years! This is one of my "losing weight" goals. I wanted to be able to cross my legs in a feminine fashion again. I realized that I crossed my legs. I looked down and said "whoa!" MB asked what I was talking about. I told her that I actually crossed my legs the way I used to and how it was one of my goals. I was so excited. She looked at me and said, "You're pissing me off. I'm gonna have to start Weight Watchers myself." Ha Ha! People at work are starting to notice my weight loss. I'm so excited.

The other bit of great news is that all my pants are getting very baggy on me. The only problem is that I'm in between sizes right now. My 18s are baggy, but my 16s are still a bit too tight. I can button, zip, and buckle them; but the tummy bulges a wee bit too much and is a little tight in the 16s. A few more pounds off and I'll be in like flynn. WooHoo! It's nice to know that even though the scales at WWAWP aren't showing a big difference, I'm seeing a big difference in my clothes, the way I feel, and the things I'm able to do.

Get this...I was also able to sit in my chair at home, bend over, and paint my toenails without having to sit up straight for air after every 2 toes. WooHoo! That was another goal of mine. I know it doesn't seem like a lot, but it is a LOT to me.

Hope you all have a great week. Until later...

Fall TV Lineup

I love the following shows that are currently in the Fall lineup:

Monday:
1. How I Met Your Mother
2. Heroes
3. Two and a Half Men
4. Journeyman

Tuesday:
1. Bones
2. House

Wednesday:
Bionic Woman – the jury is still out on this one. The
first episode got the viewer to her bionics extremely
quickly. I’m not sure how I feel about this one yet.

Thursday:
1. Survivor
2. CSI
3. Grey’s Anatomy
4. ER

Friday:
1. Flash Gordon
2. Numb3rs

Saturday:
Naruto – anime, but we’re hooked on it after the 100
episode weekend a few weeks ago

Sunday:
1. NASCAR Cup Series Racing
2. Cold Case

POST #300

Okay, so I have found through EA that SUB is just that – SUB. It seems that I am not the only one she treats the way she’s been treating me. I guess it’s just part of her considerable charm? Since I am in another building, I don’t see the way she treats those in EA’s building and SUB's always had a problem with MIO, so I just always discount whatever she does to him and don’t pay attention to it thinking it’s just because it’s him. I’m glad I said something to EA because now I know not to take it personally. It’s just who she is. What’s amazing is that she’s 33 and has mentioned that she wonders why she isn’t married or even dating anyone. She has stated that on her birthday a few months ago, she wondered what she had actually accomplished in her life since she isn’t married and has no kids (she has 2 cats). I’m wondering if her problem would be solved if she just changed her attitude and were nicer to people instead of always having to control everything and talk to people in a mean and degrading way. She mentions that others talk in a demeaning fashion. Too bad she doesn’t realize that what she doesn’t like in someone is usually what you don’t want to admit is something you actually don’t like about yourself.

I can now go on with my life and work and realize that it’s not my fault. I have always had a hard time dealing with someone with her personality type. You know what I mean. Those that always have to control everything, always have to give you their opinion, always feel the need to tell you what you should be doing or how to do something, or someone that always has to make themselves seem important even at the expense of someone else’s feelings. All this time, I thought I had a problem because I was the common denominator. Now that I look back, I realize that the only people I have any type of trouble dealing with are people that have controlling personalities. I have a very hard time with this type of personality because I always try to please everyone. I try to make sure that no one is upset around me – not necessarily at me, but I tend to attempt to smooth over any conflict going on around me. Make sure that everyone is heard and understood. Face it! I’m just too darn nice for my own good. HA!

On a great note, I noticed this morning that my black slacks are extremely loose on me. WooHoo! I am going to stand by my decision this week to lower my caffeine and raise my water intake. If this strategy helps the WWAWP scale to show my weight as being closer to my home scales, then that’s what I’m going to do. This week is my test for that. Keep your fingers crossed. I have no problem making this healthier choice if that’s what it takes for my weight loss to be effective and show on the scales that count. I’m determined to make healthier choices (even the ones I don’t really want to make). Even my rings are fitting looser. WooHoo! So far, so good. I have already had 8 glasses of water today (I normally have between 4 and 6) and I have seen the inside of our work bathroom more times than I care to count.

Anyway, why is it that when something is urgent and needs done THIS week EVERYTHING is urgent and needs to be done THIS week? Were there not some things you could have started LAST week so there is time to finish everything by the due date? Hello! Grant it, most of the things are folding letters which can be done in the folding machine, but there are some things that can’t be folded by the machine because you have to integrate two different pages. Then you have to stuff EVERY envelope not only with the letter that’s been folded but with postage paid return envelopes. One of the letters is actually five separate items that 2 have to be folded together (a total of 4 pieces in each envelope). Very time consuming stuff. You give it to me today or yesterday for the student workers, but they don’t work past Thursday and they only work a few hours each day (some days only 1 hour). Hello! Give us some time to get your stuff done, will you? Do some of it yourself. It’s not like we are extremely busy in the office this week. This last item could have been done by you instead of the students. Cutting papers into strips then attaching them to beads before Saturday’s game. That’s all well and good when we have nothing else to do, but when we have 2 sets of letters to go out and they both have to be out of the office by Friday when the worker’s last day to work each week is Thursday! That’s a bit ridiculous and hard to get accomplished. Luckily, between the two workers, they will be working 7 total hours today and tomorrow, but they have a LOT to do. If they don’t get it all completed, please don’t get on my case. You should have given us some of this stuff to do last week. One set of letters is now completed and the beads are done. Sadly, the letters that still needs to be completed is the group of four things going into one envelope. With the way the students are putting things together, it’s hard to determine exactly what has been done and what still needs done. That’s frustrating on my part because I could be helping them out right now instead of blogging. Nah! Blogging is more fun, but you know what I mean. I could be accomplishing something instead of leaving it for the student workers, but they are so unorganized in the way they work. I don’t see how they do it.

I think I’ve got the majority of all that crap out of my system.

Until later…

Things on my Mind...

Okay, so a lot is going through my mind right now. The first thing on my mind is about Britney Spears and the fact that she has to give up custody of her children to Kevin Federline. At first, I was thinking how bad of a parent must she be that Kevin would be the preferred parent of choice by a court. Then I got to thinking how terrible it was that I was prejudging Kevin and his parenting skills. I hate it for Britney that she is on this downward spiral. I know that once you get spiraling, it can get out of control real fast and you feel as though your world will NEVER be right again. I just hope she gets her life together so she can be a good mom to those boys.

I’m kind of drawing a blank right now regarding all the other things going through my head. I’ve been reading a few fiction books that deal with the Templar Knights and I have to say that I am finding it all very interesting. The last book I read (just finished it this past weekend actually) The Templar Legacy by Steve Berry mentioned a few of the things that I have been struggling with when it comes to religion. What I read makes perfect sense to me. It actually even hit a few of the problems that I have with organized religion in general. It’s amazing to know that I’m not the only one that struggles with some of those thoughts (obviously someone else has thought of them, too, or they wouldn’t have ended up in the book).

I talked with my mom today. She has now lost a total of 10 pounds in 3 weeks. Woohoo! That’s fantastic. I am so glad for her and proud of her. She’s got a long way to go, so it’s great that she’s getting a good start.

She asked if we were going to come up for Christmas this year. I told her probably not since we spend Thanksgiving with them and we like to be here for K and now K2 for Christmas since we have no kids of our own and G has taken his kids to live in CA. Mom said that they would like to have us for Christmas sometimes and I told her that I was sure H’s family would like to have us for Thanksgiving sometimes. She said we could switch it up. I then had to remind her that besides wanting to spend Christmas with K and K2 since my brother has moved his family back to CA was the fact that we never know what type of weather we are going to encounter on our way up there. One year it took us 8 ½ hours to make a 3 ½ hour trip. That was the LAST time we went up there that late in the year. Of course, I mentioned that they are more than welcome to come down here and spend Christmas with us. She said that we would end up going to H’s family’s house for a few hours and they really wanted to spend it with us (but she doesn’t want to go over to their house because she doesn’t know them and isn’t considered part of their family). Whatever! I reminded her that they came down 2 years ago for Christmas but left 2 days before Christmas. She said one of the reasons they left was because we were going to spend Christmas day with H’s family. If I’m not important enough for her to spend Christmas with me when they said they would (after I had everything planned and spent money to make it special for them) then they can live with my not being there for Christmas. G and his family won’t be there.

Okay, so I went to my WWAWP today. Here’s something I don’t understand. According to my scales (when I weigh first thing in the morning after emptying my bladder) I have lost 17 pounds. WooHoo, right? Sadly, when I weigh at the WWAWP meeting, their scales show I have only lost 8 pounds (I gained .4 pounds this week – seeing as how this is my time of the month, I can live with that because I know I made a LOT of healthier choices this week). I decided I was going to see how far off my scales are at 5:30 when I got home from my WWAWP meeting today. Get this, my scales are off by less than 1 pound. Somehow from morning to afternoon, I gain weight. I guess it could be water retention, but it seems like a lot of weight for it to all be water. The thing is, I tested it today and my scales are right. I guess one of these days the afternoon me will catch up to the morning me. God! I can’t wait for that to happen.

I definitely need to keep from getting discouraged after this week. I did make quite a few healthier choices this week. There were times that I REALLY wanted chocolate or fast food, but I was really good and bought healthy foods and salads instead. I wonder if drinking more water will help me lose the extra pounds I find throughout the day. I guess it can’t hurt. I usually drink 4-6 glasses of water. I need to up my water in take this week and see if that makes a difference in my afternoon weight. I guess that means that I will be getting a medium diet coke with my lunch every day instead of a large. HMMM, is that a choice I’m willing to make? Maybe I should limit my coffee in the mornings, too. I’ve heard that caffeine makes you retain water. I guess I may need to limit my caffeine. I could test this theory for a week and see if it makes a difference for me. If it doesn’t, I can always go back to caffeine. Am I willing to make this choice? I’m not sure. Will it be a healthier choice for my body? Absolutely! Have I decided that I will make healthier choices? Yeah – I know where you’re going with this. More water and less caffeine equals a healthier body. Since I have said I want to be healthier and make healthier choices, logic would dictate that I need to add water and lower my caffeine. Damn! I hate that I’m so smart and realize that I need to make a change I really don’t want to make. I will make the choice to lower my caffeine intake this week and add more water to my system. Damn it!

Until later...