Plans Demolished

After all this time, I should know NEVER to get my hopes up because they ALWAYS come crashing down around me. Always, yet…I never learn. I must be the stupidest person EVER. ON. THE. PLANET! I NEVER learn this lesson about getting my hopes up.

Ireland is now a thing of the past. Yes, you read that correctly! I am no longer going to Ireland in October. My boss (BB) gave H the time he needed to change his mind and no longer feel as though we could afford the trip. She had my vacation request since April 9! As of Monday (when I let the office know that I am no longer going to Ireland), she still had not signed it.

I found out today from a co-worker that she had been planning on me taking the trip and wanted me to spend it as a vacation with my husband instead of working the trip (since the trip is being put together by my office, one of us may have to go and work the event and answer any questions or solve any problems that may come up while there). Strange how she can let the office know that she approves of my going to Ireland as a vacation, but she can’t tell me so I can pay the deposit and get the ball rolling. It's MY damn vacation. I should have been the FIRST person to know it was approved.

H is kind of frustrated with me right now because I’m bitching about BB and completely sad and demolished because the trip is now off the books. I’m soooo frickin’ frustrated right now. I really can’t even go into this anymore right now because I’ve got tears springing into my eyes.

I’m so tired of getting my hopes up for them to be dashed on the bits. Don’t tell me what you think I want to hear. Tell me what you’re thinking so I’m prepared when you change your mind. With H, deep down I always know there’s a chance he’ll change his mind; but I was really unprepared for it this time. I thought he was looking at this as a “once in a lifetime” trip just as I was.

Happy Frickin' Hump Day!
Until later...
k